I am what you call a “pacer”.   I learned from the best – my brother.  He is far better at it than I.   He is not adverse to pacing whenever the situation calls for it, a consummate pacer if you will.  On the other hand, I am more a moderate “pacer”.   My brother is 14 years older than I and had his pacing habit thoroughly cemented in his psyche by the time I even arrived in this world.  My mother was always more than slightly annoyed by my brother’s frantic walking (sometimes sedate, depending on what was on his mind)  so when I manifested the pacing syndrome she decided to try to nip it in the bud.   To that end she was fairly successful.   She couldn’t completely eradicate the urge out of my life, but she was able to train me to only pace during certain activities.  To this day I cannot carry on a decent conversation on the phone without being in movement.  When there are extreme emotions or difficulties I am facing – I will pace uncontrollably as well, phone or no.   I refuse to apologize for this slight deficiency in my programming.  I read a long time ago that people who pace are creative, brilliant thinkers.  That’s my story and I’m sticking with it.

That causes me to have a slight problem with this whole writing thing though.  I find it difficult to just sit to write, so you will often find me at my computer to write a paragraph then pop up to do something before sitting back down again.  Instead of interrupting my train of thought, it often intensifies it.   I must state, though, that I am not ADHD/ADD nor have I ever been diagnosed with any attention disorders.  I just plain need to be moving in order to allow my thoughts to congeal.  What I really need to do is find some way to walk and type – then we will be set.  I am an expert on it when it comes to my Droid – but I am a lot slower than I am when on a computer.  I can type as fast as I talk on the computer, on my Droid it is more like a slow drawl.  Needless to say I prefer to type my thoughts out as they come to me.

Lastly, in case you are curious and find yourself reading this in an increasingly mystified manner – those of us who pace often have tunnel vision as we walk.  We don’t see the world around us in quite the same light, as our vision is actually focused inward towards the part of our brain that is figuring it all out.   The mind is working so fast that it requires our body to do some repetitive movement – which is why you won’t find us taking huge jaunts around the neighborhood, but quickly stalking out the length of our homes (if even that – I have a few routes through my house my mind falls back on).

Hmmmm.. maybe I need to invest in a dictation machine and carry it around throughout my day.  That way I can whip it out to voice my thoughts for translation later.   I would do it in a heartbeat if it didn’t smack of my days as a legal secretary.   Guess I need to give it some thought.

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